Ninja Love Bonnie and Goemon Main Story
by BonBon94
Summary: I am a HUGE lover of Japanese Dating Sim Games, and Ninja Love is my absolute favorite! However, I feel like the MC is a bit... crazy. This annoyed me quite a bit, so even though it's a tiny bit taboo, I decided to write me into this story and how I would respond.
1. Chapter 1

Today was supposed to be a normal day at the temple in Kashinji. It was supposed to be like any other day, where I collect food, cook, and indulge myself in research like I normally did everyday.

But that didn't happen. What happened instead, was that five ninjas came to our temple. They sat down with my grandfather, and asked his permission to take me to some place called Iga to be their symbol of unity for the various ninja tribes to fight for in a war against a man named Nobunaga. It was revealed that I was actually the daughter of the two main "royalty"of the ninjas, so to speak, and that I was a "ninja princess." Apparently, Nobunaga killed my parents, and my grandfather wasn't actually my grandfather, he just adopted me as such. Suddenly, I am forced to pick one of five ninjas to escort me to Iga, so I can be their symbol of unity.

"This is madness." I thought to myself, as I stood in front of the five ninjas. I was still in a great deal of shock over everything, and now I have to quickly make a decision about which ninja I want to guard me, when I have never even met any of them.

"Well?" Saizo said, impatiently. His arms crossed in front of him, and he leaned to the side.

"Shut your mouth!" Hanzo scolded, whacking Saizo on his shoulder. Hanzo then turned to me and smiled. "Take your time, Princess."

"Okay." I said. Time to use my powers of observation. I closed my eyes for a second, opened them back up, and concentrated.

Sasuke was definitely out. The way he has been hugging and talking to me would suggest that he has gotten into his head that he is in love with me, which would prove to be problematic. Even if that weren't an issue, the guy is loud, obnoxious, naive, and childish. He would be a nightmare to be next to for a three day voyage to Iga. No way!

Hanzo is out as well. Although he is polite and certainly capable, he is the son of the Iga Elder, and if I am really the Kusunoki Princess, then there will be pressure about us getting married to produce a good offspring combined with our lineage. I don't care about lineage, and I am not interested in seeking love at this moment in time. Too much to learn.

Kotaro seemed like the best choice. He is so quiet, which means he would most likely leave me the hell alone on this trip to Iga. However, when he started saying he was prepared to lay down his life for me, he was immediately ruled out. Martyrdom is usually a sign of serious psychological issues, which although normally would be absolutely fascinating, is not something I need at this moment in time.

It looks like I am down to Saizo and Goemon. Both of them are undesirable because Saizo is an asshole, and Goemon is an overly-confident and pompous playboy. I stared at the two for a really long time, trying to take in as much information about them from my observations as I possibly could.

I finally determined that Saizo was out. I can tell that he is a sadist, and although I am a non-sexual masochist and enjoy feeling physical pain, this is not something I want to be dealing with during the calamity of this war going on.

"I'll go with Goemon." I said. Pointing at him. He was the best choice for the job. Although he made me uneasy with his aggressively flirtatious attitude, even I knew his name, which meant he was indeed strong. Strong and capable is what I needed for this journey. Sasuke let out a disappointed sigh while Goemon beamed proudly. Saizo looked relieved that the decision was finally made and it wasn't him, and Kotaro pretty much looked poker-faced.

"Alright then." Hanzo stated, folding his arms in front of his chest. "Now that this has been decided, let's go ahead and get moving."


	2. Chapter 2

Goemon was walking around town pretty imposingly. His chin was raised, and he walked with an overly-confident spring in his step.

"Is it really okay for us to be walking around town so imposingly?" I turned and asked him as we strolled through the streets. Not only was it extremely annoying, but if he shows off too much, he could blow our cover here.

"Don't you think that trying to hide would be more suspicious?" Goemon asked, turning to me and smiling.

"Excellent point." I replied, scratching my head. Although it didn't happen often when somebody was a step ahead of me, I have to give credit where it is due. Goemon pulled out a map, and pointed to a dot on it.

"We'll be stopping by this town on the way to Iga." He said, showing me the spot where he had pointed.

"I am assuming we are stopping here so you can collect information?" I asked. This was the only logical explanation to why we were not traveling in the mountains to Iga, and stopping at a random town on the way.

"You're pretty sharp." Goemon replied, looking at me impressed. "As well as combat, it is an important part of a ninja's job to collect information. Sasuke will probably be flying through the mountains like the monkey that he is, while I, the smart brain of school, will be stopping by and collecting information."

"Alright." I said. His plan seemed perfectly logical when you thought about it.

"Also, call me Master Seibei in front of others."

"An alias?"

"Exactly. Your name will be uh, horse, deer..." He said, thinking.

"Why an animal's name?" I asked, offended. I did not appreciated being compared to an animal.

"Okay then, how about Sayo?" He asked, turning to me.

"Hmm... Sayo..."

"Do you have something against the name I have chosen for you?"

"I don't have anything against it!" I replied. This man was pushy. He expected me to go along with whatever decisions he made for me. This was going to get old quick.

"Also, I will tell you... never forget you are the Ninja Princess, and be calm in front of others."

Right. I had forgotten that my new status required me to have certain restrictions on my behavior now.

"Don't give into your emotions." Goemon continued. "Know that everything you do impacts all ninja."

This guy obviously does not know me very well, or he would know that I generally do not express my emotions, even in regular circumstances. Also, I would certainly not be as stupid as to react on a spur of the moment when it isn't just my life in danger.

"Hey, are you listening?!" Goemon said in my ear. The sensation tickled my neck and ear, and it was very uncomfortable. This was also the first time a man had been so close to me. My face turned slightly red. "Why are you blushing?" He asked, poking at my cheek.

"I'm not blushing." I denied, turning my head away. The last thing I needed was to boost this guy's massive ego.

"Also, there is one final thing. You are to completely obey my orders...okay?" He said, looking me in the eye.

"Understood." I replied nodding my head. This guy was a pushy asshole, but he knew more about ninja stuff than I did, so it was in my best interest not to argue with him on this topic. After I responded, Goemon began eyeing me up in down. "Can I help you?" I asked, looking at him sharply.

"You..." He began. "This has nothing to do with feminine charm..." He said, still looking at me.

"What on Earth are you talking about?" I asked confused. I paused for a moment, and then it dawned on me. "I am assuming you mean to say that I lack feminine charm. If that's the case, that's a pretty mean thing to say." Although it was true. I was severely lacking in the charm department.

"This way you don't look like a geisha." He said, holding his chin and looking at me.

"Why do I need to be a geisha?" I asked, looking at him bewildered. "Last time I checked, I was a Ninja Princess, not a prostitute."

"The set-up is this: you are a geisha, and I am your pimp." He answered, looking at me with an almost taunting expression on his face. "You come from the country side, and I am selling you off. This is the set-up."

"Ah, a set-up." I said, finally catching on. It was a pretty mean set-up though, seeing I had never even been near a man in a romantic way. That aside, it also insinuated that I was worth nothing more than to be a tool for pleasure for men. I then looked down at my country apparel. "Don't you think I'm gonna need a nicer kimono for the interviews with the geisha houses?" I asked, looking down at my outfit.

"Yes you will." Goemon replied. He then pointed to a store up ahead. "Let's drop by that draper."

"Alright." I said calmly. However, I was not feeling calm at all. What the hell am I doing? I have never done anything like this before. Won't my lack of skill blow our cover? We reached the draper, and stepped inside.

"Well now, please take your time to look around." The woman who worked at the store said to us pleasantly.

"Aah, I'll be choosing it, so you can take a step back." Goemon said to the woman. Irritation shot through me like a bullet. Who the hell does this guy think he is? I am perfectly capable of dressing myself.

"Okay." The woman said pleasantly. She then left the room. Whispers filled the room from the other customers. They were eyeing us and talking amongst themselves.

"This is the first time I see such a wonderful gentleman!" One woman said to her friend.

"Are those two a married couple?" The friend asked quietly.

"But aren't they somewhat imbalanced for a married couple?"

"Indeed! The girl has more common-folk features."

At the end, the two women were bad-mouthing me. I didn't really care though. It was typical for the average woman to be so frivolous and gossipy. It was hard to take them seriously when they were too busy wrapped up in other people's lives rather than their own.

"So you are quite popular with the ladies after all, Master Goemon." I said dryly as I turned to him.

"Aah, I am popular alright, but what about that?" He said calmly. It was apparent to me that he was used to this sort of attention all the time.

"Have you been with many women until now?" I asked curiously.

"Ah, of course. Even if I don't care about them, women just come to me."

"Hmm..." I responded, thinking. What an asshole.

"But this is just for fun." He said, smiling at me. Just for fun, eh? I assume this means he spends time with this many women on a regular basis. "Rather than going on about this, look at the kimonos with me!"

"Alright." I responded. I was a tad bit confused though, since he had just said earlier that he was going to pick it out himself.

The shelves are lined up with kimonos. This was the first time I had seen so many in one place. I looked around briefly, and then saw the one that I wanted on one of the upper shelves. I raised myself, and reached with my hand to the one that I wanted.

"Which one do you want? Shortie!" Goemon teased. He leaned on me from behind my back. I began to feel very uncomfortable. I had never been this close to a man before, and my heart was throbbing.

"Uh, that dark blue one from that top shelf..."

"This one?" Master Goemon stretched his arm, and took the kimono down from the shelf. I looked up at him. He really is quite tall. "This one isn't bad. Plus it looks much better than the one you are wearing now. This belt and hairpin will match with it as well." He said, pointing to the items on the shelf adjacent to us.

I was impressed. This guy really knows what looks good on women. I guessed that this was a regular thing for him, so he was used to it. Suddenly, Master Goemon started undoing my belt.

"What are you doing?!" I exclaimed.

"Come on, take it off quickly. I'll help you change, alright?"

"I can change myself!" I shouted. This was not acceptable.

"Ah, okay... But I'm pretty good at helping put on a kimono."

"..." I had no comment to this.

"Well, I am even better at taking it off though..." Master Goemon is quite the womanizer, isn't he?

"Trust me, I'm fine." I said. "Now please turn around!"

"Wow-wow." He responded jokingly. He then turned his back to me. I got changed as fast as I could. The last thing I needed was for this guy to see me half-naked. I then turned around to face him.

"You look good." He said, smiling at me while eyeing up and down. He then embraced me, and began messing with my kimono belt.

"Why are you holding me? What are you doing?!" I exclaimed, alarmed.

"Wow, you really know nothing about men, do you?" Goemon teased. "Maybe I should teach you something about it." He drew his lips nearer to mine.

"Gah! Stop it!" I turned my face away from him.

"I was only joking. Now come on, let's get out of here." I followed him to the exit, and he led me out of the store.

The street of this town was barren and there were no people to be seen. I did not understand how you could gather information in a town like this. Perhaps I am mistaken about this being the town he wanted to stop at. I decided to double-check.

"Is this the town you wanted to stop in, Master Goemon?"

"Do you see the castle behind that mountain under construction?" He asked, pointing to the castle.

"Yeah. It appears as if they have only just now started building it." Just before anything could be said on the matter, we were interrupted by shouting.

"Hey, wait, old man!" A samurai shouted at an elderly man.

"Ah, forgive me please!" The elderly man exclaimed, cowering in fear.

"Trying to escape by yourself doesn't work!" A second samurai said. A group of samurai then surround the old man and torture him severely.

"What's going on?" I asked, turning to Goemon.

"Perhaps they are trying to recruit him for the castle construction." He replied. It all made sense now.

"I'm surprised they would even want such an old man to work." I said, scratching my head. This didn't make any sense to me.

"Okay? Since you don't wanna understand what we are saying..." One of the samurai says, pulling out his sword and thrusting it at the old man. I jump up in surprise and horror. I had to do something for the poor guy.

"Wait!" Goemon says, pulling my arm just as I was about to jump in. He then suddenly jumps up on the house roof next to the scene. "Hey, you!" He shouts at the samurai.

"What? Who are you?!" The samurai responded in surprise.

"I am well... an angel, or a dragon god perhaps." Goemon said, bemused.

"Dragon God?! Don't make fun of us!" Another samurai shouted, stepping out of the group.

Dragon God... what the hell is Master Goemon playing at? This was not computing for me.

"Guys like you should be burning in hellish brimstone." Goemon responded from up on the roof.

"You...You know that we are the palace servants of Nobukatsu Oda, and still you cause disorder!" The first samurai shouts back.

Nobukatsu Oda? I had never heard of that name before. However, he shared the same last name with Nobunaga Oda. My guess was that this Nobukatsu was related to Nobunaga somehow. The samurais mentioned they were Nobukatsu's palace servants. I wondered if he was the one building the castle over there.

"Get down quickly! We'll beat you to death!" The second samurai ordered. That sentence seemed stupid to me. If you tell somebody you are going to beat them to death when they approach you, they are not going to do it even if you tell them to. Still, I was curious how Goemon would respond.

Goemon raised his arms, and there was a loud roaring sound. All of a sudden, a giant fire ball was emerging from his body. I had forgotten that Goemon was famous for his mastery of fire in ninjutsu.

"What the hell is that?!" The first samurai shouted. The fire from Goemon's body flew up like a dragon and attacked the samurai.

"Woah!" The samurais shout, running away screaming from the fire attack.

Goemon then gracefully jumped from the roof of the house, and landed in front of me. The rescued old man dashed to him.

"Thank you so much!" The old man exclaimed, bowing at Goemon. "You are indeed an angel or a dragon god!"

"Well, of course that was a lie." Goemon said, looking down at the old man.

"Huh?" The old man said, looking confused.

"That was nothing more than a little technique." Goemon said, answering the old man's silent question.

"A technique you say..." The old man began. "Anyways, I owe you my life. Is there any way I can repay you?"

"Hmm... then let me know if there is a place to stay here."

"Unfortunately, all of the inns are currently closed. But if it's okay with you, why don't you stay at my home?" The old man offered.

"Alright." Goemon said. We then followed the old man to his house. The house was a bit worn down, and a draft was blowing through the shaky walls of the room we were staying in.

"It's a shabby house, but I am indebted to you, so I'll bring you some tea. Please wait." The old man said, leaving the room.

"It's a really shabby house, isn't it?" Goemon said, looking around. "Ouch! Ouch!" I had grabbed onto his thigh tightly.

"Hey, it's not okay to say something like that." I said, tightening my grip.

"It's okay. Besides, he won't be able to hear."

"It's mean to say bad things about someone when they can't hear you!"

"Hmm... you're a good girl aren't you?" Goemon asked, looking at me with a teasing smile.

"It's not that I am a particularly good girl, it's just that you are an...Argh!" Goemon had begun stripping off the hem of my kimono. What the hell is this guy's problem?!

"I'm getting back at you for a while ago." He said calmly. I stood there silently, confused. "A thigh isn't that bad is it?" He continued.

Although I had originally had the impression that Goemon was a good person because he stepped in and rescued the old man from the group of samurai, my opinion changed. After all, the guy had just tore off the hem of my kimono, and was now touching my thigh. Just then, the old man came back with some tea.

"So, Nobukatsu Oda is building that castle." Goemon said nonchalantly as he took a cup of tea from the old man. It was just as I had thought.

"Yes, he is always going after Iga just like his father did." The old man answered. Going after Iga?! This was going to be a serious problem since Iga is our final destination on this journey. Then I realized what Goemon was up to. He picked this town for information specifically because of the castle that Nobukatsu was planning on building there for future attacks against Iga. I had to give him credit, the guy is smart.

"So I've heard." Goemon responded.

"Thus all town folk, children, and even old people are made to work there."

"So Nobukatsu is hurrying the completion of the castle that much..."

"Yes, this is a poor town, so everyone is living to survive. The town folk have to work on the castle, so they can't earn money."

"I see..." Master Goemon kept watching the man intently with crossed arms.

Later that night, the old man brought us out one futon for us to sleep in.

"The old man must have mistaken us for a couple." I said, looking down at the futon. It then occurred to me that I was going to have to sleep with Master Goemon on just one futon. This made me feel extremely uncomfortable.

"Hey." Goemon said, as he started hugging me. He was hugging me like a princess. I hated hugs. The sensation of them are extremely uncomfortable to me, and this was no different.

"What are you doing?!" I exclaimed in response. It feels like I say this a lot to him.

"What? We're just about to sleep, right?" He asked, sleepily. Seriously? This guy has no issue sharing a futon with a woman he barely knows.

"Wait a second!"

"If I don't do this, then you wouldn't enter the futon, would you?" He had a fair point. I would rather sleep on the floor than be in one bed with a guy I barely know. Thus, Master Goemon put me in the futon. "So what will you do, Sayo? Will you do something couples do with Master Seibei?" He started hanging over me.

"No, stop it!" I shouted, pushing him away from me.

"But why?"

"Why you ask? Because I would only do such a thing with my lover!" I shouted. I don't get this guy at all.

"Hmm... so come to like me right now!" What a narcissist. I didn't even grace that statement with a response. Instead, I turned my back and circled at the edge of the futon. I felt like it was mean of him that he enjoyed playing with me so much. The house then began rattling.

"The drafts in this house are awful, aren't they?" Master Goemon commented, looking around. Although the windows were closed, cold air was still able to come through their gaps. I then sneezed.

"You're cold, aren't you?" Goemon asked me. "Come closer then!" Staying at my spot, I didn't say a word. "If you don't come, then I'll come..." He then stretched his arm and hugged me.

"No, stop it!" I said, trying to wriggle away from him.

"No, it's different. I just can't allow my precious princess to catch a cold. Aren't you cold?"

Precious princess? Seriously? Of course, I knew that he was only next to me because it was his mission. That made me feel a little better, seeing he was only doing this because of that, and he really had to interest in coming onto me. His body was warm though, and I really was cold.


End file.
